15 More Things That Will Take a 'Considerable Time'

We're confident interest rates will go up before any of these things happen

Josh Selway
Dec 19, 2014 at 9:58 AM
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On Wednesday, after much speculation, the Federal Open Market Committee (FOMC) said it will exercise "patience" before raising interest rates for the first time since 2008, though the central bank said the new language is consistent with the infamous "considerable time" phrase that's been tossed around since September 2012. In other words, no one knows when interest rates will go up -- including the Fed -- though most still expect a hike around mid-2015.

Regardless, there are some things in this world that we know for sure won't happen for a "considerable time." To name a few:

  1. The Cleveland Browns win a Super Bowl.

  2. The J C Penney Company Inc (NYSE:JCP) turnaround is completed.

  3. The NYSE closes on Black Friday and Christmas Eve, because why not?

  4. Tesla Motors Inc (NASDAQ:TSLA) and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk gives up his dream of colonizing Mars.

  5. Self-tying shoes -- imagine the time you'll save!

  6. Pete Rose inducted into the Major League Baseball Hall of Fame.

  7. TLC's programming slate sweeps the Emmy awards.

  8. Amazon.com, Inc. (NASDAQ:AMZN) successfully uses drones to deliver packages.

  9. AMZN actually has a profitable business model.

  10. Justin Bieber grows up.

  11. Justin Bieber produces a good song.

  12. Bill Ackman and Carl Icahn sing karaoke duet of "Islands in the Stream."

  13. The United States government functions competently, shows bipartisanship.

  14. Gum holds flavor for more than five minutes.

  15. "The Interview 2" is released.

The JCP turnaround will take considerable time

Be sure to check back, as we may add to this list in considerable time.


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